So here I am in New Jersey and I am supposed to be having a very AWESOME vacation prior to school but I just came across a very BIG bump. Of course, it has to do with G. The one person I love to hear from, until now.

He called me while I was at Lemar’s. “I am currently on his computer.”

HIM: What are you doing?
HER: I am just watching a movie with Lemar.
HIM: Where are you staying?
HER: Prasands.
(Silence)

Then the bitching begins. I was wrong for not telling him where I was staying … but he was wrong for not asking prior to my trip. It is like he was scared of asking, and I was scared of saying due to my last trip to NYC. Yes, I should of told him, but if he was really concerned, he would of asked. The person you are with should be concerned about where you are going to be. He usually asks “Where am I staying”, “Who am I going with?” … but this time he didn’t ask the first. HOLD UP…I remember asking him, “Do you want the number where I am at?”…and he responded by saying, “I’ll call your cell.” and I remember feeling like … I guess he doesn’t want to know…denial can I say? WOW! I did intend to tell him before but before I could, he refused to know. That is very interesting. It is like he is setting me up to FAIL due to his past.

He says I was hiding and if I truly was, I would of lied, I would not offer the number at Prasand’s house. My intentions were not to hide but to be open. So I do not feel bad because this is what he wanted. He wanted me to be HER, the infamous ex. He can not bring me down with him. I am better than that, and I did not feel guilty for his wrongs. It seems I always put my self out there and he is the one with TRUST issues. If he doesn’t trust me now, how do I know he will ever trust me? And I can not let him take away my happiness which is partly, my friends, New York, and my sanity. I put my 100% in the relationship and he doesn’t appreciate it.

I only feel bad for myself because I let him make me feel like this, hurt.

I digress.

-Liza Mae