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… stress …

Posted on 23 May 2006 by Liza Mae V.

So school is over and I am not supposed to be stressed out but I am. Whenever I get stressed the right side of my lower back begins to tighten and knot up then distributes upto my shoulder. I suddenly get an increased heart beat and I feel like I am going to burst. I hate this feeling.

What caused this senation?

Well I’ve been doing alot of thinking and not alot of doing when it comes to my job search and everyone is on me about making money, making money, and making money. My mother is pushing me to get a job and I feel like I am being rushed. I can’t sit here and appreciate my accomplishments in peace because I live with her. I am rather annoyed at the thought and the more she pushes, the more I rebel. I am tired of being treated like a child. This house is not my home.

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Sometimes my motivation is lacking because I do not see a clear future. I am lost in my own space, I am reaching a point in my life where things are not certain and the road can take its turn for the best or the worst. I call it the “quarter-life” crisis. My goal was to graduate – DONE! Now what? I am supposed to get my career started right? I feel as though there is something in between that supposed to happen and I am just waiting for that day to come. I try to stand still but forces are pushing me to where I need to be — free.

Sounds like I need to go on vacation or something. That is my solution to everything but it is anti-productive since I just pause where I am in Toronto, then when the vacation ends, life plays again. I need to change my habits. I am an addict to new people and experiences.

-Liza Mae V.

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About Liza Mae

I am a twenty-somethings female photographer in search of love, the meaning of life, and adventure. I am passionate about anything photography from the snap to the click.


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