As I dropped him off at the airport today, a trickle of tears ran down my face as we hugged good-bye.  At least this time I did not cry a river for I know I will see him soon.  The 5 weeks he was here just went by so quickly yet it felt like so many things transpired.  It began on a rocky road but things became more smooth between us and stronger than ever.  It was a really trying period for us but here we are again.  I promised us that we will be together again in less than 4 weeks and hopefully before his big Three-Zero!

So I have contacted my boss and made her aware of the situation and I am hoping to get some unpaid-leave of a minimum of 2 months but if not, I have decided to cut my losses and go with the flow of things.  I am quite terrified of doing so because it is like cutting my umbilical cord to my secure life.  I realize that doing this will hurt and disappoint many people due to their own personal reasons, but at the end of the day, I have to take care of myself and my partner.  The weight of their disappointment is weighing me down and I just feel like I don’t need that right now.  I just want support from people but I can’t change their egotistical way of thinking, so be it.  I mean it is really selfish for one to tell me to stay back because it makes them happy but what about my happiness?  I would never be disappointed in someone because they chased after their happiness but I guess their excuse is that they are looking out for me.

I’ve gone tired of trying to make everyone else happy, that I don’t really care what anyone has to say.

I’m done.

- Liza Mae