I need to clean out my closet. There are clothes that sit there untouched for months, and even years. Every time I clean out my closet it seems like its so hard for me to let some things go because of the thought that I might wear it someday but I know that I won’t. I have some things that still have tags on them and things worn only once to try on but I never found the reason to wear them. I have to toss some jeans that don’t fit anymore because I grew. I attempted to try on my tight ass brazilian jeans and boy did I struggle. I gave up trying to fit in and accepted my new size. I am no longer a 1, I am now a 3. I started to notice my hips getting bigger since school ended.

Aside During school, I usually eat more than I would during anytime of the year. I have to settle for fast food because staying long and late hours at school, I don’t have time to have home cooking and pay attention to my habits.

Every time I clean out my closet, I also clean the one within me. I try to discard everything and everyone that hold me back because I am trying to move forward. I find that the people that don’t do anything but cause me stryfe, I question why find a reason to keep them in my life? Yes, they did bring you happiness at one point, but what does the past emotions have to do with what is going on now?

I try to live for the moment because whenever I think of the future with someone, I become disappointed. So instead of expecting anything from anyone, I should enjoy it for what it is because sometimes it just doesn’t work. I was at work and my friend Francine had stated that I should just keep dating, because it brings me more happiness than being in a relationship. I found that statement very true and disturbing. I thought about it the whole time I was at work.

I know I would rather be constant than constantly moving but the harder I try to stand still, everything else is moving. So in essence I too am moving because I am one with everything.

I look at the key players in my game of life and the roles they play. I know that one day they may not be around and I should acknowledge each and everyone of them. I am grateful for them because they are the reasons why I am still here. Thank you.

-Liza