Questioning Love

Posted on 29 November 2003 by Liza Mae V.

I’ve been thinking about all the relationships I had and with that I think of all the good times I have encountered yet still have not found “The ONE”. Maybe it is me and this thing I believe in “The ONE” may not truly exist yet I still yearn for it and hope that one day it will come my way but right now everything that is happening is all just a blur.

I can’t seem to figure out what I truly want or need because I am still trying to find … ME.

Sometimes I think I know exactly what I want and when it comes I will know but how will I know?  Will I see fireworks?  Will reality seem all too surreal that I will never truly know?

Sometimes I wish that everything I truly desire will pop up and I would stop questioning everything, for the answer is simple, or is it? I look at the people circling my soul and wonder,

“Why are you here? What brought you to my existence?”

or should I be thankful that you are here with me, sharing my most inner secrets which will lead you to find me … whoever that maybe.

Why is it that when someone seems all too perfect they are gone before you know it? And the ones whom you care about but don’t impact you as much as they did, keep coming back?

I wonder why I am the way I am  and why do people come to me for advice?  I am no different from you … I can just see clearly when the situation is not me, but when it is, I am so clueless that I question. I question everything with a simple word,

“Why?”

When I do get the answer, I still question the answer. It seems as though I’m in this internal loop trying to break from the way I see things. I just want to … know. But right now all I can do is listen to these love songs and listen to their inspiring theories … which makes me believe in this thing called “Love”.   I will dream about this man in my dreams which creeps in my fantasies ever so often. I will hold his hand till I wake to the sun rising beside me and my sheets.

I will believe … have faith … and see things the way … I perceive them to be. I will … question … and have answers. I will … be free and in love.

– Liza Mae

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3 Comments For This Post

  1. Anonymous Says:

    yeah girl i can really relate to this one…i’ve taken a look at the guys that are interested in my right now…and none really make my heart skip a beat…i dont know whats not there…all i know is that they are not the one two, three, or four…and the funny thing is, i was really ready for a relationship…i mean a really serious one…now i’m like i dont feel like being bothered…maybe its just that the guys im involved with just dont do anything for me…but they are really nice and treat me well…i just dont know…something is still missing…

    -ari @she-speaks.net

  2. lizamae Says:

    I am blowing kisses … without aim … hoping you will find it on your way here.

    Ari … I feel you girl … its still troubles me with all these guys floating around me … maybe one of them is the “one” and I just dont’ know it yet … or maybe its none of them … and someone else will suddenly appear without me noticing … I don’t know what the future will bring because tomorrow never comes. I guess I have to rely on ‘fate’ to bring him back to me … this man in my dreams … which seems too much like reality. (sigh) Many say I’m still young … statistically but … I feel like I’ve been waiting for so long … that I’m starting to think that I am growing gray hairs … down there …lol… but I guess we have to wait … because we can’t settle for less then we deserve … we are GREATNESS, and we deserve GREATNESS …

    -Liza

  3. Anonymous Says:

    LIFE, I WONDER… WILL IT TAKE ME UNDER? I DON’T KNOW

    Have you ever heard the song, looking for love in all the wrong places? Not to say you are, but you know when you are in love and most of the time it doesn’t just come it is brought about over time. We all have an ideal of what love should be but there is no real distinction other than the way you feel with one person or another. Its just the intensity by which you love different individuals. You will never love you man like you love your parents, that intensity is not there. But what you really have to assess is what kind of person are you and who is it that will complement you to make love become present. I nominate………

    t

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I am a twenty-somethings female photographer in search of love, the meaning of life, and adventure. I am passionate about anything photography from the snap to the click.

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